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Chronicle of a Haphazard Existence Plagued by Anonymity [entries|friends|calendar]
Laura

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[02 Mar 2010|05:53pm]
last time i posted it was august 2009 and robert and i had broken up.  that lasted approximately one week.
we broke up again for the month of october.  got back together and broke up on valentine's day for about four days.  what can i say? 

i got a dog in october. 

i'm graduating this semester and going to grad school in the fall. 

i have been living with someone i found on craigslist and it's been virtually problem-free.

i guess that's about it. 
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[31 Aug 2009|09:56pm]
So, six months later, Robert and I broke up on Saturday.  I know it's for the best and I'm actually happier.  But it's still really sad because I did love him and it was really good in the beginning.  I'm going to miss the way things used to be.  But the fact is that that ended a long time ago without me realizing it and it was never going to be that way again.
So after Wanee, and camping in the keys, and Spring Breaking in St Teresa, and Bailey Dog, and doing homework together without speaking all night, after all the I'm sorries, after the trips home, after all of the shows and the trips to the beach and the museum and lakes and springs and sinkholes, after all the parties and the jamming out in the car to and from.
after it all, we don't even like eachother.  but i do still love him, in spite of all the hell there was at the end.  But things just have to be better now.
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[04 May 2009|11:09pm]
ok so i just had an interesting encounter with my mother.
she comes into my room and lays down on her stomach on my bed with her elbows propping her up so that she can ask me what my plans are for going to my grandma's tomorrow.  she then stops mid sentence and goes "laura. leigh. adams.  LAURA. LEIGH. ADAMS. why is there a RUBBER next to your bed?!?", pointing at a condom elegantly draped over the cot that is folded up against the wall next to my bed. 
i said "oh my god" and we both started laughing hysterically.  my mom then pointed out that my grandmother slept in here for ten days since then.  she's like "i thought you promised not to have sex in my house?"  and i was like "sorry...?"

i'm never ever bringing my boyfriend home again.
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[04 May 2009|09:38pm]
so my boyfriend's friend from childhood who he no longer hangs out with because he is fucked up in a big way despite his friends' attempts to get him help is going to move in with my roommate next year, meaning he'll be around our house for the rest of the summer because apparently now they're friends.  i don't like this at all because my boyfriend does not need him in his life again.  last time he hung out with him regularly he got in a really bad situation.  he's still cleaning that shit up.  and furthermore, i just don't fucking like this kid.  ohe got arrested more than once for breaking into old people's houses to steal prescription drugs.  he tried to ROB my boyfriend.  he brings coke over to my house and tries to convince everyone around him to get all fucked up on everything. 
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[19 Feb 2009|06:01pm]
backup plans are for sissies
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[06 Feb 2009|06:25pm]
god damn it.  i just did the math and, assuming financial aid finally gives me the money they were supposed to give me in january, i will run out of money approximately 3 months before i get anymore, leaving me with at least $2200 worth of bills i can't pay. 
tell me, america, how the fuck is anyone supposed to get an education in this country?  and to make things worse, when i graduate, i will not be qualified to do anything until i get at least a masters because my field is history and religion.  i'm trying to be hopeful but i can't help but feel like i'm totally screwed out of circumstance. 
money has limited my education in so many ways recently.  it prevented me from transferring to another school, prevented me from pursuing journalism, prevented me from going to rwanda, and continues to prevent me from doing unpaid internships.  this is a wealthy man's country and it is way more difficult than is common conception to reach that status.  i feel like i've been misled, fooled into thinking that if you just want something enough, and are willing to work for it, the system we live in will accomodate your deficits and reward your talent and ambition.  it's not true.  you need a sponsor; this is practically 18th century england.  where's my patronage?  where's my Sir Palliser?
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[12 Dec 2008|10:10pm]
getting my nipple pierced was the least painful experience i had this year.  so long 2008, i hope you are forever lost to posterity.
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[11 Nov 2008|10:47pm]
i need a miracle.
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[05 Nov 2008|01:07am]
i helped elect Barack Obama today.

i have never felt so good about the future of this country.
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[27 Oct 2008|05:59pm]
does anyone know anyone who needs a place to live in tallahassee? 

please think about it.
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[03 Oct 2008|12:19am]

ok, i know it's petty but will high-profile republicans ever learn how to say "nuclear"?
i'm looking at you, Sarah.
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[05 Sep 2008|06:10pm]
i need to grow the fuck up already.
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[01 Sep 2008|03:08pm]
ichetucknee
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[24 Jul 2008|01:21am]
the press on this is far too favorable and extremely miseleading.

i can't think of anything else that is so devestatingly comsuming, anxiety-ridden, and confusing that is still generally accepted as necessary and even desireable.  not only generally accepted, but personally accepted.  

the best way to describe it is if you could, for months on end, drag out and experience the moment a moth is buzzed by one of those hanging, light-up, zappy back-porch punishers.

no that's not exactly fair;
i'm being too generous.
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[21 Jun 2008|02:44am]
i just want to for once not feel like a piece of shit. 

happy fucking birthday to me.
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[04 Jun 2008|10:24pm]
 i am this close
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[28 May 2008|10:03pm]
if i become a historian and don't marry one, it is absolutely inevitable that i will cheat on my husband with a colleague.
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[25 May 2008|06:53pm]

james baldwin knows precisely how to capture universal realities.  recently i had a moment in which a passage of his from a book i read at thanksgiving last year came to mind immediately.  so pertinent.  funny i should use that word.  and also, thank god.

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[20 May 2008|12:08am]
 a 'miss', amiss, a miss.
missing and maybe missed.
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[07 May 2008|10:45pm]
it's so hard to tell if i'm winning sometimes.

but then i wonder if victory is like sobriety...
i once had a friend tell me "if you can't tell if you're drunk, you are".
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